Our Year: 2014

     I can't believe 2014 is nearing an end.  Seriously, where did the time go?  Time is precious, and it's no wonder why.  This year has been a good one and the Lord has been good to us.  That isn't to say it's been perfect with no trials, but we have been blessed with the Lord's love and companionship in those hard times.

      Casey started a new job the end of November and we decided to move into a bigger place.  We moved two days before he started his new job.  That was kind of rough, but we made it through.  He is enjoying it, although he is currently drinking out of a fire hose with all the information he has to take in. ;)
   
     He also began his Master's program through Western's Governors in November.  What a guy!  He amazes me all the time with all he takes on and accomplishes.  I truly admire him and am so grateful for all his hard work and sacrifices for our little family.  I love him so, so much! He is my forever!

     I am just playing house and being a mommy.  Haha! (Remember playing house? It isn't like you used to pretend is it?  Those little dolls didn't ever cause you any trouble...just sayin'.) :)
     I am truly loving being a mommy.  It really is a dream come true.  It isn't perfect, and I am quite often at the end of the day feeling like a big huge failure....but it is something I have dreamed about ever since I could play with dolls.  And I had a good example of a mom to follow....she is what made me want to be a mommy.  It most definitely has it's challenges, but boy is it rewarding.
     I am still doing hair when I get a chance.  It will be nice one day to be in a house and hopefully have a little salon.  For now, a kitchen chair will have to do. ;)

     Lilli is now 2 1/2 and is a lot of fun.  She is saying so much and learning so much.  It is so fun to listen to her talk and say so many new things.  I often have no idea what she is spouting off, but for the most part she is pretty understandable. :)
     She loves to play with her babies and stuffed animals.  She often will line them up against the wall, or the couch or her bed and sit and talk the them.  She is pretty entertaining to watch.
     Although she has a little mean streak in her (thank you terrible two's...and soon terrible three's), she really has a sweet, tender heart.  She is very loving and thoughtful.  We sure love her.

     Coleson is almost 13 months (in four days).  Yes, I am one those moms.  I count their age in months until they are two. (As a side note, it's really because they change sooooo much from 12-24 months that to say they are one when they are 18 months makes a huge difference.)  Anyway,  he is our little sweetie...for now. Haha! He is starting to get a little attitude and has been more cranky and feisty than ever before.  He sure is cute though! Good thing! ;)
     He loves to say, "cacker" for everything.  If it is food, it's "cacker."  He tries to imitate things we will say.  It's cute.  He can say mama, da-da, cacker...and there are probably other things he says that I haven't picked up on.  When I tickle him I will say, "tickle, tickle, tickle," and so he imitates that by trying to say the same thing. He is fun.  It is fun to watch both kiddos learn and grown at their different stages in life.
   

We have been blessed this year to see Casey's youngest sister, Sarah, receive her endowments in the Ogden Temple and then be sealed to her husband a week later.  We also just recently were blessed to go to the Ogden Temple to see Casey's other sister, Jennifer, receive her endowments.  Both were such beautiful occasions.  Most beautiful to be in the temple with family.  It is so great to be in the Celestial Room with all the people you love so much.  And to know one day that is how it will be in the eternities.  How wonderful!  Family is what it's all about!

     As this year comes to an end, and I reflect on this past year, I am so grateful to my Heavenly Father for all that He has given us.  He is always so good to us; in good times and in the rough times.  He is our rock.  He is who we rely upon.  We know He is there for us.  We know He loves us.  We love Him.  I am so grateful for my knowledge of the Gospel and for the testimony I have.

     I pray that next year will prove to be great for all of us!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

He Thought of Me In The Garden of Gethsemane

Yeah, oops! It's been awhile since I have written.  I will be honest, I sort of haven't wanted to because I think, no one reads it...so why bother?  Oh-well.  It's a good outlet for me and something I enjoy.  So I guess if nothing else, it's for me. :)

So I have fallen off the "no sugar" wagon.  Whenever Aunt Flow decides to visit every. single. month (can you tell I don't like her?), I tend to want to eat...SUGAR!!!!  It's awful and I have zero self control.  None.  But I am determined to get back on track.  After Aunt Flow is finished visiting.  Which, coincidentally, happens to be going on right now. :P

I have mentioned before that I really don't like what I see in the mirror.  I like from the neck up...that part is ok, but not the rest.  It's sad to say, but it's true.  I have THE most amazing husband I could EVER ask for.  He is so wonderful in so many ways, but one of those ways is he always tells me I am beautiful.  He is so sincere and true and desires more than anything for me to see what he sees.  I love him for that.  And I know that is why I was blessed with my dear, sweet Casey.  He helps in so many ways, he will never know.  He means the world to me!

I am working on it and one day will be there!  I just don't want my darling girl (and any other girls we may have) to ever view her body the way I have always viewed mine.  It's not fun, nor is it fair.  I want her to be confident in her own skin, to be happy to be who she is no matter her size!!!  But she won't be able to really do that unless she has a mommy to show her how to do so.  And I not only need to do that for her, but for me!

I know I can do anything with the help of my loving Heavenly Father and dear Savior.  Isn't that what the Atonement is all about anyway?  To help us overcome our trials and shortcomings?  This has been a real struggle all my life.  But I know that only through the Atonement of my Savior that I can overcome this.  Thank heaven for our beautiful Savior's sacrifice.  I have a very strong testimony of the Atonement.  I know it is real.  I know that it is powerful.  I know Jesus Christ knows me, He knows every single pain and sorrow I have ever experienced and ever will experience, because He himself experienced it.  I know He thought of me, little ol' me, as He bled from every pore.  I wasn't just a passing thought.  He really, really thought of me.  This is something I have come to know, without a single, solitary doubt.  I don't comprehend how He did it, but I don't need to.  I just know, through the witness of the Holy Ghost, that He did.  And I know He did it for every single person.  You, too, were not just a passing thought.

Being Mama

I love my little family! I have been thinking a lot about family lately and how blessed I am to be a mama.  I have dreamed of being a mommy all my life, ever since I was little.  I know why, too.  I had the best example of a mother.  She made it look beautiful and wonderful.  I always watched my mom and looked up to her.  She is the reason I always wanted to be a mommy.

My mom was a good example of love, service, kindness, patience, gentleness and I could go on and on.  She was a good homemaker. I loved watching her sew, cook and bake.  There was just something about the way she did things that made me want that when I grew up.  Anyone who asked what I wanted to be when I grew up would get the answer, "A mommy" (aside from the time I wanted so badly to be a "jeeter" a.k.a. a cashier....I was a weird kid, okay? :P)

I loved to help her bake.  We would make cookies and watch them bake and she would read me books while we waited for the cookies to bake.  This made a beautiful impression on me.  It is something that always sticks out in my mind when I think of memories with my mama.  It was special to me.  It was time with just me and my mom.

I don't think I can ever recall a time when I heard her yell.  I am sure she raised her voice at times, but what I remember of her was she was calm and patient and most of all soft spoken and gentle. (She still is).  I want to be like that.

What will my kids remember of me when they look back on their childhood?  I would hope they would have the same memories of me as I have of my mom.

Boy do I try!! I try so hard to be patient and loving and most of all gentle.  No one responds well to yelling. No one.  Kids especially.  I try to always get down to Lilli's level and speak to her calmly and gently.  I most certainly get frustrated and often speak louder than I should and snap at silly things, but I am sure trying not to.

I thank my loving Heavenly Father for blessing me with a wonderful example as a mother!  She has taught me so much and continues to.  I am also very grateful to my Heavenly Father for blessing my to be a mom.  There was a time I truly felt as though marriage wasn't in the cards for me, let alone motherhood.  I thought that the only "mothering" I would do would be to my nieces and nephews and  the children of others.  He just knew I needed to wait for my very special husband who is absolutely right for me!  He is special and perfect for me and I love him with all my heart.  And what I am especially grateful for is that he made me a mama.

I couldn't be more grateful for the two sweet kids I have.  Aside from each other, they are mine and Casey's whole world.  They are so special and we both feel so incredibly blessed to call them ours.  More will come one day, and we will have that much more joy.  I pray every day that Heavenly Father will truly bless me with the attributes my kids need from me and most of all, for patience and love and a gentle, soft-spoken demeanor like my sweet mama.  That is what will stay with them most.

You Could Win A Million Dollars!

You could win a million dollars!  Well, you could! But not here.  I just wanted to make you interested in reading my blog.  Did it work? ;)

So before I get to my main point of my post, I had a few little things to write.  First off, Casey asked me the other day how many "followers" I had on here.  I laughed and said, uh probably zero. So, if you have been following my posts, thanks! You are probably the only one. ;)

Second, it's been two weeks since I have started my no sugar journey! I am happy to announce I have held strong! I am so proud of myself!  Last weekend we made a quick trip to Bear Lake with Casey's family, and since it was raining, we hung out at our sister-in-law's parent's condo.  There were some yummy treats and cake but I refrained.  It is getting easier and easier to refrain.  And on the upside, I weighed myself this morning and I have lost 4 lbs. so far! Yay!!

Now, to my main post.  This morning I watched this video ---> (http://ldsliving.com/story/76653-dont-be-the-perfect-mother-be-the-mom-your-kids-need) about being the mom YOUR kids need you to be.  It really pulled at my heartstrings.  The things she said were things I have thought soooo many times! I am quite often comparing myself with other moms. This mom goes alllll out for holidays and does awesome things for her kids.  Another mom is super mom and does crafts and has every talent you can think of.  That mom is kind and patient and never yells.  Why can't I be that mom!?

After watching that video it got me thinking...what kind of mom am I?  I only have two kids...and they are still little.  So I am still sort of a rookie mommy.  However, I am still a mom, and I still compare my mothering to others.
So I thought....
I am the kind of mom who likes to have fun and be silly with my kids.
I am the kind of mom who loves make-up and hair and nail polish and all things girly.
I am the kind of mom who tries to be patient with big and little things.
I am the kind of mom who is compassionate, sensitive and loving...with tender feelings towards other's feelings.
I am the kind of mom who loves the Gospel of Jesus Christ with all my heart and longs for my children to gain a firm testimony one day.
I am the kind of mom who lets my two year old watch Fisher Price on my phone while we shop to keep her entertained.
I am the kind of mom who is ok with my two year old watching TV during the day.  And yes, even as a babysitter while I get things done, like writing on my blog. ;)
I am the kind of mom who limits the amount of TV my two year old watches during the day. ;) (I had to add that in there so ya'll didn't think I just let her watch TV all day.
I am the kind of mom who loves to give hugs and kisses (like crazy) and say I love you lots and lots.
I am the kind of mom who loves to sing songs to my kids at bedtime.
I am the kind of mom who loves to tickle my kids until they laugh super hard.
However....
I am not the mom who is a super gifted crafter, photographer, sewer, etc.  And that is where I have problems.  I hear of mom friends who are the super mom types.  The ones who do EV.ER.Y.THING.  And my whole list up there just gets lost in all the comparisons because I am not THAT mom.  I then conclude I must be a crap mom because I don't do everything.  But I love, love, love what the lady said on the video.  You are the mom your kids need you to be, and Heavenly Father sent them to you.  If he wanted them to go to the super-awesome-does-everything mom, He would have.  But he sent them to me, because He knew I would be right for them.  That is a lesson I must learn...over and over and over again.

For now, I must just be the best mom my kids need; to be the kind of mom I am and truly try to be. And most of all...be not only okay with that, but happy about it.  And that needs to be good enough! :)

What kind of mom are you or what kind do you want to be?

We. Are. Faaaamily. (I am singing that...did you hear?)

Last night we were able to go to the Ogden Temple Open house with my Loock family.  It was so beautiful in there! I felt so much peace in there, even though it has not yet been dedicated to the Lord.  It was such a wonderful thing to experience with not only my sweet little family, but my wonderful in-laws.  I love them all so much!

It was fun to see Lilli walk around in her cute little white shoe covers (she thought those were pretty neat).  She liked to see the pictures of Jesus.  Coleson was fascinated by the lights, and there were some absolutely gorgeous lights!  The celestial room was absolutely stunning!  It was so bright and beautiful in there.

Although it has changed and is renovated, it brought back beautiful memories.  The Ogden Temple was the place Casey and I met in person and was our first date.  Good memories!  That day was the day I knew he was the one I would marry.  I didn't have that exact thought, but I did have the thought, "You won't be dating anyone else ever again."  The Ogden Temple grounds is also where her proposed to me.  Ahhh, sweet, sweet memories! :)

Walking through the temple with my family brought such love and peace.  I love my little family, my Loock family and my Gilbert family.  What a beautiful thing the Lord has blessed us with.  What would we do without our family?  I don't like to think about it.

I have been so blessed.  I love and appreciate all of my siblings.  I have a friendship and relationship with each one that I treasure.  And my parents...I am so grateful for my parents!  They have always been there for me.  Being the youngest, I was able to really get close to my parents.  Aside from Casey, I consider them my best friends.  I am so grateful for them and the relationship I have with them.  They mean so very much to me.

My Loock family...I love them so much!  I am so grateful I was blessed to marry into such a wonderful family!  I love everyone of them.  My mom and dad -in-law are the best.  I truly couldn't ask for better in-laws.  I always hear stories of people really disliking their in-laws and their MIL...and I think, "Man, I am so glad I don't have anything bad to say about mine."  I am so blessed and grateful to my Heavenly Father for those blessings!

Family is so important to me and always has been.  Now I have my own little family.  Something that I have dreamed of all my life.  Ever since I can remember I have wanted to be a mommy.  And now that I am one, I couldn't be happier!  Love your family.  Cherish them.  Never, ever take them for granted.

Day 10: No Sugar

Today is day 10 of having no sugar.  It has been so much easier than I had expected.  Sure, I still get googly-eyes over all the yummy treats I see on Pinterest, but I am doing good! Granted, there have been no temptations at home, but that's also because I haven't bought or made any goodies. ;)

At our family reunion in Richfield (Gifford reunion) I did great! There were temptations, but I resisted.  I was proud of myself. Although I guess I did have sugar....in the jello salads.  It just wasn't yummy-goodies-that-I-crave sugar (a.k.a chocolate, cookies, any kind of baked goods, ice cream, etc). :)  I've totally got this!

I have been trying to eat less through-out the day and drink as much water as I possibly can.  So far so good.  Today I have already drank about 70+ oz. and am hoping to get a few more in before bed.  This goes without saying, although I am saying it, I am in the bathroom all. day. long.  Those who know me well are not shocked in the least. ;)

I weighed in on day one and then again on Monday (a week later) and I had lost 1.4 lbs.  However, when I went and donated plasma on Tuesday morning, their scale only put me as losing 4 oz.  Boooo!  Oh-well.  I have to remind myself that it is a slow process and to just be patient with myself.  I only allow myself to weigh myself on Mondays.  It is dangerous of me to weigh myself any more than that because then I get discouraged and down on myself. Just ask Casey.

I plan to continue strong!  I am bound and determined to lose this weight!

To Be Made Smooth

To Be Made Smooth

When you find you can’t get through
Because the journey is just too tough
Remember He has enough power
To smooth the places that are rough

When life shows its rocky terrains
Where it’s hard to make it through
The Lord can cause the rough places
To eventually be made smooth

When you suffer unbearable things
That only the Lord comprehends
Put all your trust in Him
And He can make amends

When you can’t seem to move forward
And you feel you’ve reached your end
Know that Jesus Christ will help you
With all of His love to lend

By the power of His words
All the afflicted were soothed
So too can His words cause rough places
To finally be made smooth

©Alisha Gilbert
July ‘09

Who Am I To Judge Another?

When I was a young girl,  I would say 13 or 14, my older sister and I would watch the kids in the nursery for what was then, "homemaking," for the Relief Society.  There was a particular mom whose kids were a little unruly, to say the least.  One instance sticks in my mind.  Her daughter had not been very nice to the kids in the nursery that night.  I remember telling her mom when she came in to get her that she hadn't been very nice.  The mom's response went something like this... "Oh.  Come on, let's go home." (I honestly don't remember what she said exactly, but I remember her brushing it off and not saying a word to her daughter.)  As a young girl this really bothered me.  I immediately judged her thinking, "Really woman? You're not even going to get after her?  You're not going to tell her that it was wrong?  You aren't going to even tell her to apologize?"  After that one time I sort of had a distaste for her.

Not too long after that instance, this woman became one of my young woman leaders.  "Great!" I thought.  I found out how wrong I had been about her.  She was sooo much fun!  I loved her! She was so fun to joke with and we always had a great time with her.  Lesson learned.  From a young age I learned the lesson of not judging others.  Especially until you actually know them!

This is not to say I am perfect at not judging, because I am not.  I can recall times I have made a quick judgment about someone and then I quickly am reminded that I myself am not perfect and neither is anything I do. 

To go back to my earlier experience...who is to say this woman didn't handle it when they got in the car?  Or when they got home?  Maybe she didn't want to say something in front of everyone?  Maybe she really didn't think it was important?  Maybe she was tired and really just didn't want to deal with it? No matter the reason why, I am no judge.  Yeah, it may have bothered me, but it didn't mean she was a bad mom or a bad person.

When I am in the store with my kids and Lilli is throwing her awesome little two-year-old-tantrums and everyone is staring, I immediately think, "All those mom's are judging on how I am handling the situation."  Perhaps they are, and perhaps they're not.  But I know all too often we are prone to judge people.  We tend to think if someone doesn't think like us, do things like us, believe like us, eat like us, cook like us, or sit like us, (ok, maybe the last few are a bit extreme, but you get my point), then they are doing something so very wrong. 

I know I want and need to be better at this.  I definitely have moments where I find myself being quick to judge.  There is this quote I found several years ago that really struck me.  At the time I was working at a care center doing hair and also housekeeping.  There was a woman I worked with who kind of got on my nerves.  I don't know why, there was just something about her that did.  And I remember feeling kind of annoyed and negative around her.  And then I read this quote: "Be one who nurtures and builds.  Be one who has an understanding and a forgiving heart, who looks for the best in people.  Leave people better than you found them.  If we could look into each others hearts and understand the unique challenges each of us faces, I think we would treat each other much more gently...."  (Marvin J. Ashton)  It hit me like a ton of bricks, and I felt guilty.  I wanted to be that kind of person.  A kind of person who has an understanding and loving heart.  Someone who nurtures and builds.  Unless we actually know the person, and know their challenges, we don't know what they are facing in their life.  Why they do the things they do.

I read a really good article something about trying to understand what happened "before the scene."  (Terribly paraphrasing).  The writer talked about how we never know what happened before we see the person and the situation [we may be judging them in].  He gave an example of a woman waiting in a line for a prescription and she had a crying baby.  People in the line were making rude comments out loud about it.  The author said that we have no idea what happened before she was in line at the pharmacy.  They listed some things that could have happened before.  If these people in the line making rude comments had known, perhaps they would have been a little more compassionate.

I know I am going to resolve to be more like my Savior.  To consider "the unique challenges each of us faces."  For, "who am I to judge another when I walk imperfectly?"

Visiting Bessie

Today we went and visited our sweet 95 year old friend, Bessie.  When Lilli was 8 months old, we started to go sit with Bessie while her daughter, JoLeigh, was at work.  Bessie has been living with her for a few years now and we had the privilege of going and sitting with her.  She is the sweetest and kindest lady.  Lilli absolutely adores her and so do I.

I love the elderly.  That love started when I was in hair school.  I had "regulars" who would come weekly to get their hair done.  I loved it!  (Ultimately, I would love to work in a care center doing hair).  Because of this love for the elderly, I was excited to learn of this "job" to sit with Bessie.  At the time things were tight financially and we were trying to find ways to earn extra money.  The Lord knew this, and truly blessed us!  While sitting in a primary presidency PPI with the bishop, the president mentioned her neighbor (JoLeigh) needing someone to sit with her mother and would pay $10 an hour.  We had been talking about JoLeigh for a calling in the primary and that is when the president mentioned this.  It really had nothing to do with what we were talking about, but I felt that this was the Lord's hand in it.  After the meeting I told the president I would LOVE to do it if JoLeigh was ok with me bringing Lilli.  So she talked to her neighbor and told her about me, and so JoLeigh called me.  She basically called me to tell me when to come.  So we started in December of 2012 and we quickly fell in love with Bessie. I truly enjoyed visiting her and getting to know her.  Both of my grandma's have passed and it felt like I gained a new grandma. 

JoLeigh is a HS teacher and works every other day because of the school's A/B schedule.  So in the summer we didn't go help.  So when we started again in the fall of 2013, I was pregnant with Coleson.  We continued to go sit with her until I had Coleson, and then they started having hospice come in.  So now, unfortunately we don't get to go sit with her every other day, but we try to visit her as much as we can.

Lilli, as I said, adores her!  Every time I ask if she wants to go see Bessie, she gets soooo excited!  It's so sweet.  I hope that as my kids grow, I will have many opportunities to serve and visit the elderly so they can learn compassion and love for them.

I am so grateful to my loving Heavenly Father for not only giving me a chance to earn some extra money, but most of all get to know a very special woman.  I will always treasure Bessie and the blessing it has been to get to know her and learn from her sweet, kind example.

As a side note: Today is day 3 of my no sugar journey.  So far so good.  I know it may be tempting this weekend when we go down to our family reunion, but I know I can be strong! Wish me luck! :)

Lol! I thought this was appropriate for today's post! Teehee :)

I love this little dude so so much! He totally is a mama's boy, and I love it! :) Coleson Casey Loock 9 months (3 days shy)

 Our family November 2013, two weeks after Coleson was born.  Time for a new one!

 I love this sweet girl!  She warms my heart with her sweetness.  She knows the love and kindness of the Savior because she was having Him (Christus statue) hug her baby.  <3 her!

I love that Lilli loves to help me.  She always says to me, "I help you."  She loves to help me bake, make dinner or do dishes.  It may be slower than I would prefer to go, but I think it's important.  I always loved helping my mom cook or watch her.  She is my sweet, sweet girl!

Mirror, Mirror on The Wall

Don't look now, but this is my THIRD day in a row writing on my blog.  Say what!?  I probably shouldn't say anything...I may jinx myself. ;)  Today also makes it my second day of my no sugar journey.

It really hasn't been hard, though it never is when there are no temptations. ;)  When I get around temptations, it may be a different story.  But, I think I may be surprised at how easy it will be.

Yesterday I went with my cute sisters-in-law to watch my youngest sister-in-law pick out her wedding dress.  It is always so fun to hang out with the girls!  I am so blessed to have married into such a wonderful family!  I love them all so much.  

While at the bridal store, there were mirrors, of course.  Big mirrors.  And I sat right in front of one.  Not a good idea.  I couldn't help but just stare at myself...in disgust.  I tried to keep my eyes averted so I didn't see myself, but it was hard.  The thing that kept running through my mind was, good thing you are trying to lose weight.  That image is burned in my memory and I just can't believe how big I have gotten.  Because this image is burned in my mind, it makes me that much more determined to lose weight.

This is a struggle I have had all my life.  I have ALWAYS struggled with body image. Even the times I thought I was "fat," I was skinny!  I am so blessed to have Casey as my husband.  He is so good at telling me I am beautiful and getting after me when I am not so nice to myself.  He lovingly reminds me that I need to really pay attention to how I look at myself in the mirror and how I talk about myself.  And I am trying...really, really trying.  I do not want my sweet Lilli (or any of my kids) to grow up having the same body image complex as I have always had.  I want her to look in the mirror and see a beautiful, confident girl no matter her shape or size.  I want her to know that no matter her weight, she is beautiful and wonderful and capable of anything she puts her mind to.  However, she needs her mommy to teach her that.  I never want to see her look in the mirror in disgust as I have often done, or say anything about her body as I have said about mine. So I am trying.  I am consciously trying to not say anything about about my body, unless it is positive.  I also am consciously trying not to have a look of disgust when I see my reflection in the mirror. It most definitely takes serious effort.

I am slowly getting there. It has taken a loving husband and three years to get where I am today, and I still have a long way to go!  But I know I will get there!  I am just so grateful to Casey who has boosted my self-image and my confidence in ways I know no one could have done but him.  He truly is the best!  I love him more and more every single day.  Heavenly Father truly knew I needed Casey.

 

 

No Sugar Journey: Day 1

 Well today is the day!  Although it is only 11 AM, I am feeling good about this. I weighed myself this morning and it confirmed my decision that I NEED to get serious about this.  I know I can do this!

The kids and I went on a walk this morning.  Holy hat rack.  Where we live, anywhere you go, you will eventually have to go up a hill to return home.  My normal route home is a steep hill, but not super long.  But to change things up a bit, I decided to go a different way.  Huh-uh, yeah...bad idea.  It was all fun and games until I came to the biggest hill of. my. life! Ha! I felt like it was a mile long hill and that at any moment I could collapse, and the stroller would roll over me and down the hill.  Although, let's be honest, if I did collapse, I would quite likely be the break for the stroller to stop. :)  Once I got to the top of the hill, I felt like dying, but I was proud of myself!  I even said, "Good job, Lish," to myself.  I am a good cheerleader. :P

This will take self discipline, which I clearly lack.  But I want to prove to myself that I CAN do this! I have a goal to lose 40-60 pounds. Oy!  I will need all the cheerleaders I can get! :)

My motto is going to be: "Move more, eat less." I've got this! :)

Back To Blogging

Remember that one time I started a blog...and then pretty much never wrote on it? Yeah, oops! It has almost been three years since I have written, which is pretty sad!  I am hoping I can be faithful in writing on here.

I am starting tomorrow (August 11th) not eating sugar.  To be completely honest, I am the biggest I have ever been.  And it disgusts me. My problem is I have a hard core sweet tooth. Give me anything sugar, and I am a happy gal! It is super bad for me, but I unfortunately love it! Soooo I decided I needed to stop.  I need to lose weight, and a great way to start for me is to give up sugar.  I know a lot of people have said not to give it up completely, to still have cheat days, but for me, a cheat day turns into cheat days...and cheat days turns into cheat weeks...and...you get the picture. :)  

I have tried this before...again and again...and every time I fall flat on my face.  So I wanted to try and hold myself accountable by recording daily (or as often as I can) how each day goes without sugar.  This way I can look back and see how it has made a difference in how I feel! :) Wish me luck!! (I am going to need it!) 

Life is good here at the Loock household.  Casey is looking for a job in his field, political science.  His looking has been to no avail, but we have faith in Heavenly Father that the right job will come at the right time.  I liken it unto trying to find someone to marry! You desire it so badly, but you have to rely upon the Lord's knowledge of what is best for you...and what time is best.  And since I was 27 when I got married, I learned time and again that His time is the best time...and He truly knows what it best!  I have faith in Him.

The kids are growing like crazy, and it is so fun to see.  Lilli will be 2 1/2 in October, and Coleson will be 9 months in five days. :)  They are mine and Casey's pride and joy.  We love them so much! 

Lilli is a character.  She is definitely going through some learning and growing (a.k.a the terrible two's). However, I try not to think of it as "terrible."  She is a pill sometimes, and often stresses me out with how she likes to hit Coleson and other kids.  She tends to be sassy and she pulls some pretty nasty (yet funny) daggers. But...and this is a big but...she's a kid!  I remind myself this over and over and over.  She doesn't have the logic of an adult.  She thinks like a two year old.  Yet, with how two-year-old-ish she can be, she is a sweetheart.  She will give me random hugs, kiss me on my forehead, or kiss me on the arm when I am singing to her at bedtime.  I also find her quite often rocking her stuffed animals and telling them "Shhh, it's ok."  I love her.

At the end of the day I have to stop and think to myself, ya know what?  No matter how much I feel like I failed as a mom today, my daughter is learning how to be loving and compassionate, and that to me is one of the most important qualities to have.  She is learning from mine and Casey's example, and for that I am grateful.

Coleson...oh my sweet, sweet Coleson.  My Coley Pokey.  My Cole Cole. My sweetie boy. He is a gem, that one!  He truly has my heart!  He is always so chill.  The only time he really cries is if he is tired or hungry (or Lilli hits him :P). He is so fun to watch learn and grow.  He tries so hard to scoot around, but mostly he just lies on his tummy and literally go in circles to each new thing on the floor.  If he is on his tummy on the floor lying one way, I can go and come back and he is facing a totally different way.  One day he will crawl. :)  But I am fine with him not being mobile yet. ;)

I hope to keep up with this everyday!  I love writing in my journal, so this can be my way of doing so. :)